MEMORIES
Thanks for the Memories
Illustrations by Bill Cigliano

No one ever said working with the variety of people who cross our paths every day would be easy. But as the following readers' stories prove, it's certainly never boring either! The editors at EB have selected a sampling of the funny, entertaining, and touching responses to our call for your finest stories. We hope you enjoy them.

No Sale: The Nose Knows

I had one customer, a young man in his late teens, who said he found the perfect frame except for one thing: "The design on the metal frame does not match the design on the metal nose ring I am wearing."

Jon Hunt
McFarlane Eyeware
 Ames, Iowa

FEEDBACK: Pizza and Poly

Mitchell, a vivacious 8-year-old boy, had to get glasses. In the process of selecting the frame and lens options, his mother expressed her concerns about the costs. However, through creative selling and an outstanding frame technician, we convinced her of the safety features of the polycarbonate lenses for kids. She got Mitchell the poly lenses. The day he came into the office to pick up his glasses was like any other. We fit them to his face, gave him a case, and sent him on his way.

After they left the office, mother and son went to a pizza joint for lunch. Mitchell was standing with other kids at the front of the store looking through a window and watching pizzas being made. Suddenly, the pizza-maker accidentally hit the glass. It shattered, broke, crashed, and fell all over Mitchell. He was cut from one end to the other, but his glasses, although a bit bent out of shape, were in great condition. And, despite a small scratch on one lens, his eyes were completely protected.

Mitchell's mom came in to our office the next day and told us of this occurrence. We ordered a replacement lens for his glasses, and she thanked us over and over for convincing her to get polycarbonate lenses for her son. In her words: The lenses saved his eyesight and his future.

 Carrie Abfall
 Mike Irons, O.D.
Columbus, Ind.

The Craziest Excuses:

For Breaking Eyewear...

Several decades ago at Pacific University College of Optometry's dispensary, a cantankerous patient drove off several interns with his demands. As the staff member on duty, I approached the boisterous gentleman to see if I could help.

Charlie was a gold prospector and this was his third trip to town to get new glasses. They'd need to take some bumps and knocks-the last pair of metal safety specs were broken beyond repair thanks to a mule.

After a brief chat, Charlie agreed to try a nylon athletic frame. His selection: Criss Optical's MAG (Mask-Adaptable Goggle...no temples to bend since it uses a band).

About a month later, he was back. The frames were beat up badly and without lenses, but Charlie looked happy to see me. The prospector said he'd set a dynamite charge and left his glasses laying there after he put a fire in the hole.

Charlie's request? Some new lenses and a back-up pair of MAGs. I was happy to oblige.

  Ric Peterson
 The Army & Air Force Exchange Service (AAFES)
 Dallas, Texas

For Lost Eyewear...

A client was in an airport men's room wearing his glasses inside a shirt pocket. He leaned over and the glasses fell out and into the toilet. While reaching in for the glasses, he moved to the side; the auto flush activated and promptly flushed his glasses down.

  Joseph Lerner
 Eyeglass House
 Plainview, N.Y.

For Missing Parts...

Recently, a lady came into the Custer Eye Associates, Custer, S.D., with an eyewire screw missing on her frame. She explained: "I was drinking a cup of coffee and, suddenly, I could feel the screw fly, then my glasses came apart. I looked all over for the screw and couldn't find it. I finished drinking my coffee, and I believe I swallowed the screw."

Gladys Beusch,
 ABOC, FNAO
 Hot Springs, S.D.

 

SATISFYING: Heartwarming Hug

Perhaps the most personally satisfying experience that I have had is with a child named Christian. He had needed a kidney transplant, which had strapped his parents financially. Christian also has many visual problems, including a high plus Rx, which most area superopticals were hesitant to tackle.

Sensitive to the family's financial issues, we provide his eyewear free of charge. The rewarding part comes from being able to see Christian now and then for minor repairs or adjustments. Every time he gets ready to leave, Christian supplies me with a gargantuan hug. That is what makes this job worthwhile!

 Natalie S. Sedgwick, ABOC
 Benedict Optical
 Lewisville, Texas

Savvy Strategy: Have a Nice Day

Because all practices and dispensaries deal with difficult people, we came up with what we think is an excellent idea that other doctor's offices in our area are now using. We took a 4" by 6" packing box and we drew happy faces all over it, labeled it the Have A Nice Day Box, and cut a hole in the top. It sits on the counter by our checkout, and when we encounter the real pain customers, we write their names down on pieces of paper and slip them into the box.

At the end of the week, we pull all of the names out and shred them. This helps to vent the frustrations and it works wonders!

  Carrie Abfall
 Mike Irons, O.D.
 Columbus, Ind.

 

CELEBRITY: Star Search

One of my customers, a retired teacher, had been coming in for months asking if I knew what glasses her favorite anchorwoman on CNN was wearing. Finally, the woman wrote to the anchor. The newscaster actually took the time to write her back and send the Ann Klein frame style name and number. The lady's so thrilled that she's just bought three more pair.

Juanita Moman
 Moman's Optical
 Gadsden, Ga.

ECCENTRIC: Leaky Lenses

While a sales rep waited for a sales appointment with an optometrist in a rural community, a farmer walked in and asked to see an optician. The man struck up a conversation with the sales rep, saying he wasn't seeing well with his current pair of glasses. The sales rep said perhaps his prescription had changed, which would explain why he might not be seeing clearly.

The farmer showed the rep several scratches in the lenses and said, "See these scratches? They are large and are causing the power to leak out of the lenses. That's why I can't see with them."

Don Ruden, president/Pamela Diercks, sales and marketing coordinator
 Expert Optics, Inc.
 Shorewood, Ill. 

Look for more memorable moments in upcoming issues of Eyecare Business. If you have memories you'd like to share, please send them to Amy Spiezio, managing editor, Eyecare Business, 1300 Virginia Drive, Suite 400, Fort Washington, Pa., 19034; fax 215-643-1705; or e-mail them to spiezioaj@boucher1.com.